Tommy Dorfman Exposes Plane Passenger’s Anti-Trans Texts Mid-Flight
The 13 Reasons Why actor publicly shames a fellow first-class traveler for sending hateful messages about her, sparking a debate on safety and visibility for trans people.
CANADA —
Key facts
- Tommy Dorfman posted photos of a male passenger and his phone screen showing anti-trans texts.
- The passenger wrote, 'Guess what is sitting next to me? A ******* transsexual in the midst of going from a man to a woman.'
- He also called Dorfman a 'freak' and sent 'deeply misogynistic' texts about a flight attendant.
- Dorfman stated, 'the audacity of this man so blatantly blasting off texts about me.'
- She said the incident reaffirms her choices for her own comfort, but noted the cost of safety in America.
- A contact named Samantha replied to the passenger, 'Just remember many people you love are lgbtq+ and this country sucks for them right now. Be kind!'
- Dorfman praised Samantha and another contact named Dave who called her a hot babe.
A Confrontation at 30,000 Feet
Tommy Dorfman, the actor known for her role in 13 Reasons Why, has publicly called out a fellow first-class airline passenger for sending anti-trans text messages about her during a flight. In a series of Instagram posts, Dorfman shared photos of the man sitting next to her along with screenshots of his phone, revealing a stream of vitriolic comments. The passenger’s texts began with, 'Guess what is sitting next to me? A ******* transsexual in the midst of going from a man to a woman.' He added, 'Just my luck 🍀 I was hoping for a hot babe!!' and referred to Dorfman as a 'freak.' The messages also included what Dorfman described as 'deeply misogynistic and revolting comments on our flight attendants.' Dorfman captioned the post with a blunt message: 'Someone get your grandpa.' She then elaborated in a longer caption, framing the incident as a stark reminder of the challenges trans people face daily.
Dorfman’s Response: Refusing to Stay Silent
In her caption, Dorfman addressed the broader implications of the encounter, writing, 'objectively, i know i’m not “passing” and i’m “bricky” and “clocky” but passing hasn’t been the point for me nor should it be for any trans person.' She emphasized that her transition is about 'alignment and autonomy for my own comfort, not the comfort of others or the expectations of society.' She continued, 'the audacity of this man so blatantly blasting off texts about me (sparing you the deeply misogynistic and revolting comments on our flight attendants in contrast to my freak) only reaffirms the choices i’ve made for myself to feel safe and comfortable in my body and spirit.' Dorfman acknowledged the cost: 'this does come at the cost of safety and comfort in the world, especially in america, and that’s not without consequence internally and externally.' Dorfman also defended her decision to go public: 'and why post, you may wonder? because i can and this man is an alt right vampire.' She expressed gratitude for her life and ability to 'fly freely (for now).'
Allies in the Cabin: Samantha and Dave
Dorfman highlighted two fellow passengers who came to her defense. A contact saved as Samantha replied to the man’s texts, writing, 'Just remember many people you love are lgbtq+ and this country sucks for them right now. Be kind!' Dorfman responded, 'samantha ily girl,' over a photo of the reply. Another contact named Dave appeared to call Dorfman a 'hot babe,' a gesture she also praised. The presence of these allies offered a counterpoint to the hostility, illustrating that even in a confined space, support can emerge. The incident underscores the precariousness of public spaces for trans individuals, where a single seat assignment can become a flashpoint for harassment.
The Passenger’s Identity and Flight Details Remain Unknown
Dorfman did not disclose the passenger’s name, the airline, the flight number, or the date of the incident. The only concrete evidence is the text messages she posted, which she alleges were sent by the man seated beside her. The lack of additional details leaves the story centered on Dorfman’s account and the texts themselves. This absence of context means the public record is limited to Dorfman’s quote and the screenshots. The incident, as reported, stops at her response, making the act of exposure the primary news event rather than any subsequent action by the airline or authorities. For readers, the practical takeaway is that the allegation stands on its own, with no further corroboration or rebuttal from the passenger.
A Broader Conversation on Trans Visibility and Safety
Dorfman’s post has ignited discussions about the risks trans people face in everyday settings, from airplanes to public streets. Her refusal to 'pass' on her own terms challenges societal expectations and highlights the tension between personal authenticity and external safety. She noted that the encounter reaffirmed her choices but came at a cost: 'this does come at the cost of safety and comfort in the world, especially in america.' This statement reflects a reality for many trans individuals, who must weigh self-expression against potential hostility. The incident also raises questions about the role of social media in holding bigots accountable. By posting the screenshots, Dorfman transformed a private humiliation into a public statement, leveraging her platform to expose the harassment.
What Comes Next: No Indication of Follow-Up
As of now, there is no word on whether the airline or authorities have been contacted. Dorfman’s post does not mention any plans to pursue the matter further, leaving the incident as a standalone act of public shaming. The passenger’s identity remains protected, and no response from him has surfaced. The story may fade without further developments, but it has already contributed to the ongoing dialogue about trans rights and harassment. Dorfman’s actions demonstrate a growing trend among public figures to use their platforms to call out discrimination in real time, shifting the power dynamic from victim to accuser.
A Personal Stand with Public Resonance
Dorfman’s decision to expose the passenger was both personal and political. She wrote, 'i am lucky to have the life i have, the ability to fly freely (for now), and even post **** like this.' The phrase 'for now' hints at a precariousness that many trans people feel in the current political climate. By sharing the texts, Dorfman not only defended herself but also highlighted the casual cruelty that trans individuals endure. Her post serves as a reminder that visibility can be both a shield and a target. The incident, while small in scale, encapsulates a larger struggle: the fight for the right to exist in public spaces without fear. Dorfman’s response—defiant, articulate, and unapologetic—offers a model for confronting hate head-on.
The bottom line
- Tommy Dorfman publicly exposed a plane passenger’s anti-trans texts, turning a private harassment into a viral rebuke.
- The passenger called Dorfman a 'freak' and expressed disappointment at not sitting next to a 'hot babe.'
- Dorfman emphasized that her transition is about personal alignment, not societal expectations of passing.
- She acknowledged that her visibility comes at the cost of safety, especially in America.
- Two fellow passengers, Samantha and Dave, defended Dorfman, showing allyship in the moment.
- The incident highlights the ongoing risks trans people face in public spaces and the power of social media to call out discrimination.


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