Tommy Dorfman Exposes Seatmate's Transphobic Texts Mid-Flight, Ignites Debate on Safety

Key facts

• Tommy Dorfman, 33, caught a man sending transphobic texts about her during a flight last week.
• The man texted: 'A f***ing transsexual in the midst of going from a man to a woman. Just my luck I was hoping for a hot babe!!'
• Dorfman shared zoomed-in screenshots of the texts with her 1.1 million Instagram followers.
• The passenger also texted a woman named Samantha, who replied: 'Just remember many people you love are lgbtq+ and this country sucks for them right now. Be kind!'
• Dorfman came out as transgender in 2021 and is best known for playing Ryan Shaver in Netflix's '13 Reasons Why'.
• She described the man as an 'alt-right vampire' and said she posted to give Samantha 'her flowers'.

A Confrontation at 30,000 Feet

Transgender actor Tommy Dorfman was seated next to a man in first class on a flight last week when she noticed him typing furiously on his phone. Zooming in with her own phone's camera, she captured screenshots of messages that referred to her as a 'f***ing transsexual' and a 'freak.' Dorfman, 33, who came out as transgender in 2020, shared the images with her 1.1 million Instagram followers, sparking widespread outrage and support. The incident has reignited conversations about the safety and dignity of transgender people in public spaces, particularly in the United States.

The Texts That Sparked a Firestorm

The unidentified man texted a contact: 'I am in the first aisle of First Class. Guess what is sitting next to me? A f***ing transsexual in the midst of going from a man to a woman. Just my luck I was hoping for a hot babe!!' He sent a similar message to a woman named Samantha, adding: '2 and a half hours of sitting next to this freak!!' Samantha replied: 'Just remember many people you love are lgbtq+ and this country sucks for them right now. Be kind!' Dorfman also posted a video showing the man texting another person: 'The stewardess in the first-class cabin is hot as hell!!!! Offsets the freak!!'

Dorfman's Response: 'The Audacity'

In her Instagram carousel, Dorfman wrote: 'The audacity of this man so blatantly blasting off texts about me (sparing you the deeply misogynistic and revolting comments on our flight attendants in contrast to my freak) only reaffirms the choices I’ve made for myself to feel safe and comfortable in my body and spirit.' She acknowledged the trade-off: 'This does come at the cost of safety and comfort in the world, especially in America, and that’s not without consequence internally and externally. I am lucky to have the life I have, the ability to fly freely (for now), and even post sh*t like this.' Dorfman added: 'And why post, you may wonder? Because I can and this man is an alt-right vampire AND because Samantha deserves her flowers.'

A Broader Commentary on Trans Visibility

Dorfman also addressed the man's comments about her appearance, writing: 'Objectively, I know I’m not “passing” and I’m “bricky” and “clocky,” but passing hasn’t been the point for me, nor should it be for any trans person. We are all allowed to evolve in any way that feels true, and that evolution can expand and contract.' Her remarks highlight a tension within the transgender community over the concept of 'passing' and the pressure to conform to cisnormative standards. Dorfman, who transitioned publicly in 2021, has been open about her journey and the challenges of living authentically in a society that often stigmatizes trans people.

The Stakes for Trans Americans

The incident occurs against a backdrop of rising anti-trans legislation and rhetoric in the United States. According to the Human Rights Campaign, 2023 saw a record number of bills targeting transgender rights, particularly in areas like healthcare, sports, and public accommodations. Dorfman's decision to publicly shame her seatmate reflects a growing trend of trans individuals and allies using social media to document and push back against discrimination. However, it also raises questions about privacy and the risks of online vigilantism. The man's identity remains unknown, and it is unclear whether the airline or authorities have taken any action.

What Comes Next

Dorfman has not indicated whether she plans to pursue any formal complaint against the passenger. Her Instagram post has garnered widespread support from fans and fellow celebrities, many of whom praised her courage and resilience. The incident underscores the everyday indignities and dangers faced by transgender people, even in seemingly safe spaces like first-class cabins. As Dorfman noted, her ability to 'fly freely' may be contingent on the political climate, which remains uncertain for many in the LGBTQ+ community.

The bottom line

• Tommy Dorfman publicly exposed a fellow first-class passenger's transphobic texts, sparking a global conversation about trans safety.
• The man's messages included slurs and complaints about sitting next to a transgender person, as well as misogynistic comments about flight attendants.
• Dorfman used her platform to highlight the trade-off between living authentically and facing public hostility, especially in the U.S.
• The incident reflects broader societal tensions as anti-trans legislation surges across the country.
• Dorfman's response emphasized that 'passing' is not the goal for all trans people, challenging societal expectations.